Justice League of Arekere!

As the hero discoverd that there are other species in this planet that are not normal, he decided to form a league with those. there is a silent, suburbian place called arekere which is filled with cows and their dung. otherwise a road runs through it. somewhere inside the dense jungles (near a tea shop), between two stone hedges, lies the league headquarters. this is where the league members meet up and eat (jobless pricks). the league consists of:

BARTMAN: usually seen with a black cloak and a belt full of gadgets. sketched with very talented artists, looks good with all dark drawings and fancy gizmoes. he lives an alias life of a bassist who plays funk stuff to fund himself. he has the credit of forming the JLA. and as his punchline goes, "all of you have been frogified!"

CATWOMAN: yet another person who is seen with a black cloak (saves material cost). she wanders in the dark proving to be an effective theif / stealth assasin. purrs and spits out furballs when no-one's lookin :p. her alias is always an anonymous so no one has a clue on wat shez upto! also involved in funding of JLA.

Dr Pissed (R): this is a lab experiment that went horribly wrong. the scientists wanted to create a perfect superhero and they used the recipe of Einstien's brain and Ultimate warrior's body. they made a mistake in calculation and ended up with einstien's body and ultimate warrior's brain. and if this creature dint talk, the JLA would have put it to sleep long ago. but now its a very important member of the JLA (office boy). useless in combat but very effective in scout. walks sideways at times.

LUCIFER: a Doom bringer. fat and ugly, but an strength hero. can kill others with its 6th spell. prefers meele combat and strives on fire. its alias lives with the name Wally whoz involved in hacking and job consulting. hangs out with chicks and attends home EC classes.

Wonder Woman: usually seen with a red blouse and blue cheddis. is under the impression that her "lasso of Justice" is an effective tool to bring about justice. lil she knows that we relish killing instead of justice. uses the alias of ladyparadox who is a reporter of a magazine. enjoys threatening chicks who work for her and has a bad road rage.

the fight scenes is based on the DND rulez (since its the most confusing rules) which is turn-based. a lil facts abt the rulez can be referred to a wise sage called fargo. the rulez can be found in:-
http://www.gamespy.com/articles/633/633817p1.html

if anyone is bored enuff to join the league, plz add a comment and u would be taken care of. :D u can select your characters provided that its not one in the list.

i would also be happy to announce that during one of superdalda's quests, he entered the cave of moogaagaa booga and embraced the DARK SIDE. now hez a double-lightsaber wielding Sith Lord. plz welcome the arrival of DarthDalda.

Storytime!

since every other blogger writes a story / poem, decided to write one of my own. this is a story abt myself with my alter egos. i come as a fat, ugly hip-hop nigga with criminal cases against me. i have absolutely no talent, a sore throat and dress up like i represent a jewellery shop. but i managed to make a song with 2 lines and had 3 men rapping behind me with some scantly clad chick dancing in front of me. the video also features me in front of a merc and walking the dog. this made into the top of the charts and i made a double platinum album with one song to my credit. (rest of them featured other artists incl santana) and now i m a billionare with all posh bla bla bullshit. i forgot my real name but my friends (and fans) call me the 'Double D'.

but, i have a alterego, SUPERDALDA! i come as a superhero who is seen with the underwear inside the pant. i was born in some galgalatic planet where the ppl look human and crashed into earth in a cardboard box (ouch that hurt). i was adopted by farmers and i was ragged by farm animals when i was a kid. one day, my dad told me that 'i should fight for justice'. i heard it as 'i should fight justice'. from then on, i have been beating up cows, goats and sheep. (cant help it, that farm sucked). i moved into the city to make a fortune and thats when DD stepped in.

Chapter 1: 'Attack of the school kids'
on a hot tuesday afternoon, where tempratures were soaring to 36 C, a bunch of school kids were crossing the road. suddenly, they saw an HUGE BIGASS TRUCK heading towards them at a blinding speed of 50 kmph. the kids start screaming for help panic-stricken on the road. suddenly, out of the blue came SUPERDALDA! (probly because he got stuck in his cape) with a series of huge jumps, he got to the kids and carried them away to the side. then the hero went to cross the road himself thinkin that there is still sometime left as the truck handnt reached the spot. the truck driver on the otherhand thought otherwise. (poor chap had been workin in a 16 hr shift and was less than 4 km to drop off his package) he swerved to the right and all the kids could see is a BIG ASS RADIATOR near their face. the next thing the superhero could remember was looking at a bunch of schoolkids flying like bowling pins after a strike. the truck skidded and hit a lamp post become coming to a halt. the driver jumped out of the truck and ran for his life. and the hero heard lots of screaming and wailing behind him and noticed a few ppl looking in his direction. THA END (for now)!

Wadda wonderful planet!

Been watchin too many CSIs lately. In all the episodes, i have noticed that the weapon used is usually a gun else a knife. but quite a few of the murders happen with other articles which are intended for non killing purpouses. so the point i m trying to make is, point out any article which cant be used to kill ppl. i have been trying to find atleast one article which we use in our daily life which is totally harmless. tried the lot. i was under the impression that a pacifier can be harmless but when it gets into the mouth and gets stuck in the throat, taa daaaaaaa. as far as i m concerned, everything that we use can be fatal. love this planet. yay!

Can cats be used to wash bikes? PT 2

first of all, i m blogging again because i had some problems tryin to edit my prev blog. sorry for the sons and daughters who have toiled their lives to gimme webspace.

comin bakk to mah main topic, CAN CATS BE USED TO WASH BIKES?
for this delicate experiment, u will need:-
1. A Bike (duh yea)
2. A Cat (any brand)
3. Buckets of water
4. Some car/bike shampoo

firstly, u need to silence the cat for this experiment because u cant bear the meows of the cat while u r conducting this experiment. and since the SPCA etc are growing concerns over killing of animals (though most of them are non-veggies), killing the cat would be a strict no-no. also a moving cat would be more effective while cleaning. the techniques used to silence the cat are:-
1. tape its mouth
2. glue its mouth
3. stich its mouth
4. hit its mouth with a hammer? dont think it will work though u may do this for sheer pleasure. drive a nail if reqd. but the nail may damage the bike when u are using the cat.

now when the cat is ready, make sure u have a bucket ready near the bike so that u can make your movements lesser. pour a bucketful of water on the bike so that u dont rub the cat directly on the bike. take a bucketful of water and add the shampoo. make a good mixture, soak the cat well and rub the bike. do this throughout the bike (notice that the tail can be used in some places where the rest of the cat wont fit). once the bike is soaked with shampoo, rinse the bike with a wet cat to remove the stains. and then use a powerhose and clean the bike to remove the fur stains. else shave the cat completely before doin this experiment. powerhose the bike anyways, like the feeling. once u have a clean bike, u can dispose the cat by either burying it in your background else by selling it to koreans as dinner. i would suggest the latter cause u can establish a good trade.

p.s. note that this blog is completely devoted to bikes and has no concerns over the cat's condition. the cat is just an entity which provides a cheap alternative to sponge. a cat cant carry u places. a cat sheds hair. a cat is smelly. u are not allowed to put stickers on a cat. a cat does not come with a rear view mirror. a cat has no service stations. a cat cant digest petrol. there is no ignition key in a cat. etc. and for those of you who were under teh impression that i am gonna train the cat to do things, think again. plz do not be under the impression that life is a fantasy RPG (though i m hooked into those all the time). its easier to clean with a cat rather than teaching a cat to clean the bike.

Can cats be used to wash bikes?

as the topic said, can cats be used to wash bikes?

more details when i wake up!

My saliva is aerodynamic

today, just after lunch, i realisied that i had a red substance stickin in my teeth. assuming the natural thing was to spit it out, i went to the wash basin and did some tounge exploring to remove the evidence, took a deep breath and spat it out. and as it went down the basin, it formed an arc which i have never noticed before in my saliva life. this reminded me of the famous banana kick by david beckham. now i know where he got his ideas from! the reason behind this path of travel has not been concluded but experts say that it was caused by a zephyr which passed by durin the flight of the saliva. unfortunately the experts could not come to a concrete decision because the evidence was flushed down and travelled deep into the sewers to be traced. all experiments have been withheld until more evidence is found. i have a small cold comin up and i guess this could be the stepping stone to success. i just hope that i dont step on somethin bad. we are plannin to make a wind tunnel experiment tomorrow and come to a conclusion. plannin to write whitepapers on this subject. science is a wonderful subject!!!

Work Ethics!

somethin that i have noticed in my previous employment is for the fact that you should not work at a good pace. the ones that need to be submitted in time can be done at a decent pace ensuring that u finish it a good 10 min before u submit it and spend all that time in front of the comp making it look a lil dignified. if you have completed everythin within the reqd time, dont submit it early. make sure u stay in front of the comp and act like you are workin seriously on the report. and when they plead for the report, send it over and immidiately run away from the place so that watever work they r plannin for you can be postponed else given to some1 else. i made the mistake of completing all the tasks before itself and ended up doing others work too. from the 3rd week onwards, i started workin in a considerable pace which made my work go all day long. i did the same shit and ppl started appriciating me for my commitment and when i worked more than that, i was accused of avoiding work. :s

meeting time - a weekly motivational rubbish used to happen all the time at godforsaken hours. used to enter the meeting room late giving test administration / reports as an excuse and used to get off the meeting early to process the candidates (trust me on this, i have actually got out of meetings to meet candidates). though all of us are aware of the fact that meetings are a rubbish idea and fails to motivate even boy scouts. the point is when i did this, everyone started talkin abt me being a busy guy who cant even stay in one place for more than 5 min.

the best part in this was i had no idea i was doin those till a friend pointed that out. tha cool.

for those who got zonked out at this point, suggest that u read dilbert since his english is better than mine and better illustrated than mine. his book has strip cartoons which r funny too. :D